Flirty, feisty, desired, shaky, ashamed, questioning.
I texted him. Very suggestive, witty text. Testing boundaries. I know I should say no, stop it, ignore it... But I can't. I'm drawn to it. Why do I let this determine how I feel about myself. Amy I using bipolar as an excuse to be unfaithful, to test those waters again? Will I ever be able to be in a faithful relationship? I destroy everything and I know it's wrong. I just can't stop. It's like a high, it makes me feel good, I breath in deep and feel numb. (Stupid hand tremors.... I struggle to write.)
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