Life is nothing but a series of interruptions.

I don't usually spend time preaching to the masses on here. To be honest, while I do believe that Christians should be a witness, I don't believe that they should bombard others with their believes. I believe in a mutual respect between all beliefs... I'm in no position to try and convince anyone that they are wrong in what the belief, as I stand upon my own shaky ground of belief....

However, I have had moments in my life, especially over the last couple years, that have seemed to have a message just for me. It seems as if God is telling me that I need to get my life together. I can't always explain the situation, the epiphany, the light at the end of the tunnel.... It just happens, ya know? Like today.

I've been living in this mental HELL. Each day feels like my insides are trying to break free of the confinement of my skin. It's horrible. I want to die. Seriously. Death is such a rewarding escape. I couldn't take much more.

The last time I went to church, I left in panic. I couldn't think in that building. My mind kept racing, screaming, "GET OUT!!!" I plotted my exit, to be of the least disturbance and drove home as fast as I could. I hid in my room... Getting me out of there was as likely as our success in Iraq... nonexistent.

Last night I decided to go to church again. It was calling me.

This is what I learned:

Life is nothing but a series of interruptions. We spend our days waiting to get through the next issue...

-once we get our finances on track

-once I start to feel better

-once I overcome this illness

-once my kids grow up

Instead of living for the day, we live for what might come tomorrow... As if we decide our own destiny. It's like we think that once the finances get on track NOTHING else will become an obstacle; it will just be smooth sailing. In reality, though, the finances fall on and off the track, the kids grow up but still need your guidance, the illness comes and goes, and you neglected God. Of course, you may wonder, where God would come into this.... But, we have to remember

1.God knows where we are and what we are going through.

2.To seek God now and to live now instead of waiting until our situation changes.

3.God's plans are better than ours.

He hasn't forgotten you. He knows right where you are.

4.We can trust that God is good and that everything he does is for our own good... (we can't say the same for our own actions)

We miss him because we want answers and we are not seeking him.

5.We can be assured that is we genuinely seek him, we will find him.